1: Tunnel Vision
Have it. One of my all time favorite movies is Big Fish. It's about a traveling salesman who falls ill and is confined to his deathbed. He has a gift for storytelling and decides to make an attempt at mending his relationship with his estranged son. My favorite scene of the entire movie is when the father recalls the night he fell in love.
Time stopped. Amid the chaos and commotion of the circus he was at, he saw nothing but the girl of his dreams. He didn't see the trapeze artists flying through the air, nor the giant elephant that could have crushed him with a simple step. He didn't even pay any mind to all the other pretty girls along the way... all he saw was her.
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| "Now I may not have much, but I have more determination than any man you're ever likely to meet." |
That's how love should be... where nothing else even matters. When you can be in a room full of hot girls but only find one beautiful. Where temptation doesn't even exist because you already have perfection.
2: Trust
If you don't have it, you'll never get anywhere. If you can't let someone into your life, how can you truly love and appreciate them? It's scary, without a doubt. But monitoring someone instead of giving them freedom is the easiest way to create jealousy and unnecessary drama. If your girl wants to check your text messages, something's wrong. If you have a passcode on your phone just so that your girlfriend can't check your text messages, something's wrong.
Have a little faith. Actually, have a lot of faith. I've been on the bad side of things... dating a girl for what seemed like forever, being completely open, honest and giving, and then having her decide she was through with me out of the blue. It was hard to deal with, but later that day I realized it really wasn't my fault... and I was... happy?
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| Although it is extremely peculiar, the music video for Gnarls Barkley's "Who's Gonna Save My Soul" is wonderful. |
Although I gave my heart to someone only to feel like they crushed it, I kept my heart on my sleeve the entire time. To know someone doesn't want you, all of you, the TRUE you is something that is easier to live with then we realize... to not give yourself completely, to half ass love has to be the worst feeling ever. That is something we should strive for. To not be scared of love or being completely vulnerable, but in never having our vulnerability challenged. In the words of Tennyson, "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
3: Enhancements
This one is pretty simple, yet 99.9% of people manage to fuck it up on a consistent basis... be happy with yourself before you try and be happy with someone else.
We live in a world where people are emotional wrecks constantly complaining about being "forever alone" or how all guys/girls are the same. Yet for some reason they get the bright idea that being with someone will make everything in their life better. If you're not happy on your own, don't ever think you'll have a successful relationship with another person. A significant other shouldn't be part of you, they should be an enhancement.
4: Spend Yourself
Ever purchase a steak from a restaurant and forget it's in your fridge for a couple of weeks? You open up the container and it looks like a bad Petri dish experiment some high school kid forgot about in his chemistry class. However, you find a cheeseburger you purchased 6 months ago from McDonald's that your buddy dropped between your seats and was too big of a douche to clean up and it looks the exact same as the day you bought it.
The difference between the two? Nothing real lasts forever. When you don't pump something full of artificial bullshit, it's gonna have an expiration date. If you want to eat healthy you stick to the outside perimeters of the grocery store where all of the fresh food is located. When you want something that doesn't expire for 3 years after it's opened and could survive a Chernobyl disaster, you walk down the aisles and purchase artificial food.
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| There was steak at the wedding last night... it was delicious. |
Although we preach that love is eternal, eventually we're all going to die. To add salt to the wound, we can die at any moment... whether it's ten minutes from now in a freak accident or in fifty years from old age. Yet so often couples walk around disgruntled, rarely showing affection or appreciation for each other.
ARE YOU NUTS?! Your love can literally keel over at any moment... wouldn't you want to make the most out of every moment available? There will no doubt be bad times and arguments, but when you don't have a single second on Earth guaranteed, shouldn't we strive to enjoy every moment we have granted to us?
Don't leave anything left over... don't stick things in the back of the fridge and forget about them... enjoy it while it's here because even the real things aren't gonna last forever.
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